Julie B. Beck Mother’s Who Know….October 2007
“Mothers who know are always teachers. Since they are not babysitters, they are never off duty. A well-taught friend told me that he did not learn anything at church that he had not already learned at home. His parents used family scripture study, prayer, family home evening, mealtimes, and other gatherings to teach. Think of the power of our future missionary force if mothers considered their homes as a pre–missionary training center. Then the doctrines of the gospel taught in the MTC would be a review and not a revelation. That is influence; that is power.”
Boyd K. Packer “Little Children” Ensign October 1986
“True doctrine, understood, changes attitudes and behavior. The study of the doctrines of the gospel will improve behavior quicker than a study of behavior will improve behavior. Preoccupation with unworthy behavior can lead to unworthy behavior. That is why we stress so forcefully the study of the doctrines of the gospel.”
If we are focused on our childrens misbehavior and that is our focus. The teaching of doctrine will change that behavior quicker than changing the behavior. We need to focus on teaching them correct doctrine.
Your mood is so much better. You still have the Spirit to be with you.
I was watching the Herbie movies. There is a time or two and there is a time he loses a tire. Have you ever thought about driving a car with 3 tires. It doesn’t work well. If you took off 1 leg of your dining room table what happens. The reason I like to call this lesson the 4 legs of the table is because this is the foundation for building the righteous family. Because your family is out of balance you can put in a lot of good stuff, but it tends to slide off. This is the foundation for every good righteous family.
2. Scripture Study
4. Temple Attendance
You have wonderful excuses for that. We only have family prayer once a day….because…because…because… The whole focus has to be not telling him why you can’t do it, but going to Heavenly Father and saying this is a tough thing for me but how do I do it.
Henry B Eyring Ensign “Finding Safety In Council” April 1997
“One of the keys to recognizing those warnings is that they are repeated. For instance, more than once in these general conferences, you have heard our prophet say that he would quote a preceding prophet and would therefore be a second witness and sometimes even a third. Each of us who has listened has heard President Kimball give counsel on the importance of a mother in the home and then heard President Benson quote him, and we have heard President Hinckley quote them both. The Apostle Paul wrote that “in the mouth of two or three witnesses shall every word be established” (2 Cor. 13:1). One of the ways we may know that the warning is from the Lord is that the law of witnesses, authorized witnesses, has been invoked. When the words of prophets seem repetitive, that should rivet our attention and fill our hearts with gratitude to live in such a blessed time.
When we reject the counsel which comes from God, we do not choose to be independent of outside influence. We choose another influence. We reject the protection of a perfectly loving, all-powerful, all-knowing Father in Heaven, whose whole purpose, as that of His Beloved Son, is to give us eternal life, to give us all that He has, and to bring us home again in families to the arms of His love. In rejecting His counsel, we choose the influence of another power, whose purpose is to make us miserable and whose motive is hatred. We have moral agency as a gift of God. Rather than the right to choose to be free of influence, it is the inalienable right to submit ourselves to whichever of those powers we choose.”
What is a warning…it tells you something is wrong. It is to alert you that something is going to be wrong and I’m helping you do something about it.
If I know the consequences of overeating, but don’t do it will I be spared the consequences of it. Was I free from consequences of not eating right? The consequence may not be immediate. The consequence lightning did not strike my car. I ‘know’ but I am not willing to pay the price with exactness. You would know because you could look at me and see it. If you heed the warnings with exactness will you have to come in here and tell me? No.
Class member: I don’t know that we would have to tell you, but our experiences during the week.
I will see it in your countenance. Your home radiates with the Spirit. You will radiate with the Spirit.
Pick one and work on something. Something is better than nothing, but is it going to get me where I want to be.
Jeffrey R Holland “I Have A Question” Ensign 1976
“The quality of our obedience to God’s commandments is still the clearest expression of the quality of our faith in him.”
Scripture Chain…one scripture leads to another…teaches a whole doctrine about something that you might have missed if you have just read the first scripture.
‘you have supposed that I would give it unto you, when you took no thought save it was to ask me.’
What are your prayers like?
‘you did not continue as you commenced’
Did we continue on (especially after a good day) to pray with the same intensity. “What do I need to do to develop patience?” We expect the Lord to do it. We pray with real intensity for a couple of days and then let it go. It’s learning self-discipline. This is a long term answer.
“I, the Lord, am bound when ye do what I say; but when ye do not what I say, ye have no promise.”
There is a law, irrevocably decreed in heaven before the foundations of this world, upon which all blessings are predicated—And when we obtain any blessing from God, it is by obedience to that law upon which it is predicated.
If you want a blessing find the law upon which it is predicated follow the commandment.
Financial Wealth---Tithing, Fast Offerings & Keep Sabbath Day Holy D&C 59
What I the Lord have spoken, I have spoken, and I excuse not myself; and though the heavens and the earth pass away, my word shall not pass away, but shall all be fulfilled, whether by mine own voice or by the voice of my servants, it is the same.
“Obedience Life’s Greatest Challenge” Donald Staheli April 1998
President Ezra Taft Benson put it most poignantly when he said, “When obedience ceases to be an irritant and becomes our quest, in that moment God will endow us with power.”
Problems in our home….(from little until they leave)
No Understanding of the Gospel
Lack of Responsibility
All those problems can be changed by living the 4 Table Legs. Look at the law and the blessings. Choose the blessings you want and live the law with ‘exactness’ to receive those blessings.
Law: Family Prayer morning and night, Personal Prayer morning and night, 3x Blessing on the food, and couple prayer, and a prayer in your heart all day
Class member: I was in the Hill Cummorah Pageant. That was one of the first times prayer hit me. We would have a devotional. Start with a prayer. Throughout the whole thing we prayed all the time. I was aware of how many people prayed.
Promised by President Hinckley….The Blessings of Family Prayer Ensign Feb 1991
- Check the dread disease that is eroding the character of our society
- Developed within the family a new appreciation, a new respect, a new affection one for another
- A love for others above self
- A respect for others
- A desire to serve the needs of others
- Build within the hearts of our children a much-needed respect for authority
- Nothing that will so much help to ease family tensions
- Bring about the respect for parents which leads to obedience
- Erase the blight of broken homes
- Restore integrity, mutual respect, and a spirit of thankfulness
Feb 2001 “No Substitute For Family Prayer”
President Ezra Taft Benson taught: “Just a few words added to the blessing on the food, as is becoming the custom in some parts, is not enough. We need to get onto our knees in prayer and gratitude.”
“Greatest Challenge in the Word is Parenting” James E Faust October 2009
President Kimball answered, “In the past, having family prayer once a day may have been all right. But in the future it will not be enough if we are going to save our families.”
I have had life saving experiences that have been in answer to family prayer.
Class member: My 4 year old is good at saying prayers part of the time, but other times it’s too hard. How do I encourage her to say the prayer?
This morning I will say it and then tonight you can try it again. You need to be saying their prayers sometimes. You can force the Spirit away. You can’t force them to feel the Spirit.
Does it matter what time of day you do it? I recommend that each of your children have their own scriptures, red pencil, tablet and pen. Teach them to make a workbook out of the scriptures.
Class member: My kids adored the little tiny Book of Mormons.
Class member: Draw pictures by the stories. Let them scripture chase.
Class member: Electronics…what do you do about it?
They need to have a chance to actually mark them. They have a hard time knowing how to mark them. Their scriptures need to be able to be marked in. We are going to color and write and mark up.
Class member: My old visiting teacher. Every time she reads the Book of Mormon she buys a new one and marks it up differently…Faith, Testimony, etc. Make them a workbook.
That feeling is what you are going for. You want them going through it and riffling through it. We scripture chase. Get them their own copy of the Conference talks. In the Friend there are things about the Conference talk. When they get old enough to read they need their own. It is their scriptures for 6 months.
President Ezra T Benson “Cleansing The Inner Vessel” April 1986
“I counsel you, my beloved brothers and sisters and friends everywhere, to make reading in the Book of Mormon a few minutes each day a lifelong practice. “I feel certain that if, in our homes, parents will read from the Book of Mormon prayerfully and regularly, both by themselves and with their children, the spirit of that great book will come to permeate our homes and all who dwell therein. The spirit of reverence will increase; mutual respect and consideration for each other will grow. The spirit of contention will depart. Parents will counsel their children in greater love and wisdom. Children will be more responsive and submissive to that counsel. Righteousness will increase. Faith, hope, and charity—the pure love of Christ—will abound in our homes and lives, bringing in their wake peace, joy, and happiness.” (Marion G. Romney, in Conference Report, Apr. 1960, pp. 110–13.)”
- Spirit of reverence will increase
- Mutual respect & consideration for each other will grow
- Spirit of contention will depart
- Parents will counsel in love and wisdom
- Children will be more responsive and submissive to counsel
- Righteousness will increase
- Faith hope and charity will abound
- Peace joy and happiness in your home.
“This Day” Henry B Eyring April 2007
“A morning prayer and an early search in the scriptures to know what we should do for the Lord can set the course of a day. We can know which task, of all those we might choose, matters most to God and therefore to us. I have learned such a prayer is always answered if we ask and ponder with childlike submission, ready to act without delay to perform even the most humble service.”
Family Home Evening
1915 Joseph F Smith counseled church
1970 FHE Manual
1999—2x that year FHE Monday night “We strongly suggest, we strongly encourage…”
Visiting Teaching Message
“Family home evening is for everyone,” President Spencer W. Kimball and his counselors declared. “It is for families with parents and children, for families with just one parent, and for parents who have no children at home. It is for home evening groups of single adults and for those who live alone or with roommates” (Family Home Evening , 3)
The purpose is to teach and train and bind the hearts. When you go the Lord as a ‘quest’ he will tell you how to make it work. When you go as an ‘irritant’ the heavens close.
Elder David A Bednar “More Diligent at Home” November 2009
“Sometimes Sister Bednar and I wondered if our efforts to do these spiritually essential things were worthwhile. Now and then verses of scripture were read amid outbursts such as “He’s touching me!” “Make him stop looking at me!” “Mom, he’s breathing my air!” Sincere prayers occasionally were interrupted with giggling and poking. And with active, rambunctious boys, family home evening lessons did not always produce high levels of edification. At times Sister Bednar and I were exasperated because the righteous habits we worked so hard to foster did not seem to yield immediately the spiritual results we wanted and expected.
Today if you could ask our adult sons what they remember about family prayer, scripture study, and family home evening, I believe I know how they would answer. They likely would not identify a particular prayer or a specific instance of scripture study or an especially meaningful family home evening lesson as the defining moment in their spiritual development. What they would say they remember is that as a family we were consistent.”
Neil L. Andersen “Prophets & Spiritual Mole Crickets” October 1999
“Certainly there are times when getting the family together to read the scriptures does not stack up as a spiritual experience worthy of a journal entry. But we must not be deterred. There are special times when the spirit of a son or daughter is just right and the power of these great scriptures goes down into their heart like fire. As we honor our Heavenly Father in our homes, He will honor our efforts.”
- Love at home will increase
- Obedience to parents will increase
- Faith will be developed in the hearts of the youth
- Youth will gain power to combat the evil influence and temptations
Neil L. Andersen “Prophets & Spiritual Mole Crickets” October 1999
“If the Saints obey this counsel, we promise that great blessings will result. Love at home and obedience to parents will increase. Faith will be developed in the hearts of the youth of Israel, and they will gain power to combat the evil influence and temptations which beset them” (in James R. Clark, comp., Messages of the First Presidency of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, 6 vols. [1965–75], 4:339).
Who within the sound of my voice would be willing to sell these promises to those who would confiscate our Monday nights? Not one of us.”
The temple may be the only place we can go to find the spirit of peace. We will need to bring it back into our homes.
LAW: Regular temple attendance….what’s the minimum? This law is more open than any of them. Regular temple attendance is between you and the Lord. The question is “is it a quest or an irritant’? Any day you decide to go Satan will make it inconvenient. You can expect there to be something will go wrong.
Check your legs of the table and see if you need to go to the temple.
(Vaughn J. Featherstone)
1-If a man, you will become mighty; if a woman, powerful (D&C 109:22 And we ask thee, Holy Father, that thy servants may go forth from this house armed with thy power, and that thy name may be upon them, and thy glory be round about them, and thine angels have charge over them;)
2-It will serve as great "insurance protection" for your marriage (D&C 132:19 And again, verily I say unto you, if a man marry a wife by my word, which is my law, and by the new and everlasting covenant, and it is sealed unto them by the Holy Spirit of promise, by him who is anointed, unto whom I have appointed this power and the keys of this priesthood; and it shall be said unto them—Ye shall come forth in the first resurrection; and if it be after the first resurrection, in the next resurrection; and shall inherit thrones, kingdoms, principalities, and powers, dominions, all heights and depths—then shall it be written in the Lamb’s Book of Life, that he shall commit no murder whereby to shed innocent blood, and if ye abide in my covenant, and commit no murder whereby to shed innocent blood, it shall be done unto them in all things whatsoever my servant hath put upon them, in time, and through all eternity; and shall be of full force when they are out of the world; and they shall pass by the angels, and the gods, which are set there, to their exaltation and glory in all things, as hath been sealed upon their heads, which glory shall be a fulness and a continuation of the seeds forever and ever.)
3-The blessings of the Eternal Gods will be called down upon you. (D&C 109:12, 14 That thy glory may rest down upon thy people, and upon this thy house, which we now dedicate to thee, that it may be sanctified and consecrated to be holy, and that thy holy presence may be continually in this house; And do thou grant, Holy Father, that all those who shall worship in this house may be taught words of wisdom out of the best books, and that they may seek learning even by study, and also by faith, as thou hast said)
4-Unseen angels will watch over your loved ones when Satanic forced tempt them (Acts 27:33 And while the day was coming on, Paul besought them all to take meat, saying, This day is the fourteenth day that ye have tarried and continued fasting, having taken nothing.)
5-Your families will draw close to the Lord and there will be no empty chairs in the celestial kingdom. (Hymn#301 I Am A Child of God)
6-Your children will go on missions (D&C 109:58 That from among all these, thy servants, the sons of Jacob, may gather out the righteous to build a holy city to thy name, as thou hast commanded them.)
7-Your children will marry in the temple. (Conference Talks)
8-The veil will be thin, you will have great spiritual growth and many spiritual experiences will distill upon you. (D&C 138)
9-You will be prepared for exaltation--with a celestial mind, celestial body and a celestial personality (3 Nephi 12:3, 20 Yea, blessed are the poor in spirit who come unto me, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Therefore come unto me and be ye saved; for verily I say unto you, that except ye shall keep my commandments, which I have commanded you at this time, ye shall in no case enter into the kingdom of heaven.)
10-You will see clearly how to make critical decisions that weigh heavily on your mind (D&C 109:42 But deliver thou, O Jehovah, we beseech thee, thy servants from their hands, and cleanse them from their blood.)
11-You will become Christlike. (D&C 109:22-25 And we ask thee, Holy Father, that thy servants may go forth from this house armed with thy power, and that thy name may be upon them, and thy glory be round about them, and thine angels have charge over them;
“Temples & The Work Therein” David B Haight October 1990
“John A. Widtsoe wrote: “I believe that the busy person on the farm, in the shop, in the office, or in the household, who has his worries and troubles, can solve his problems better and more quickly in the house of the Lord than anywhere else. If he will … [do] the temple work for himself and for his dead, he will confer a mighty blessing upon those who have gone before, and … a blessing will come to him, for at the most unexpected moments, in or out of the temple will come to him, as a revelation, the solution of the problems that vex his life. That is the gift that comes to those who enter the temple properly.” (“Temple Worship,” The Utah Genealogical and Historical Magazine, Apr. 1921, pp. 63–64.)”
Heavenly Father has given us simple things to do with exactness. He has promised us great blessings if we will keep these commandments. I promise you that you will feel a great feeling of love and peace in your home if you keep them with exactness.
“This Day” Henry B Eyring April 2007
“On many days, doing what matters most will not be easy. It is not supposed to be. God’s purpose in creation was to let us prove ourselves.
We will weep, and He will weep, if we have intended to repent and to serve Him in tomorrows which never came or have dreamt of yesterdays where the opportunity to act was past. This day is a precious gift of God.”
Homework: Pick one and do it before the end of class. You will see a change.