Class member: The biggest thing I got from the lesson was doctrine. That word has been pounding in my brain. I felt the truth of teaching the doctrine will cover all the bases. It meant a lot.
Class member: I realized I should have had this lesson 5 years ago. It was kind of defeating. It was good to hear it from a man’s perspective. I feel like I have made all these mistakes, but I have others coming up to teenagers. I appreciated them understanding the ‘why’. That is the most important thing I got out of it.
Class member: Mine was also the ‘why’. We are not high tech in our home. Teaching the doctrine and the ‘why’. I started asking her back ‘why do I want you to do this?” It resolved a lot of conflict between us. A couple times she just said, “You tell me.”
Class member: I think about percentages. I took a look at me. He pointed out the hypocrisy that we have. What am I doing? And I downgrading for a few hours? I can clean up as I’m trying to teach my kids good habits as well.
Class member: It was a difficult class for me. I didn’t really have limits as to what I was allowed to read and watch. I’ve watched and read a lot that I shouldn’t have. It got me thinking about down the road when I’m confronted with them wanting to watch something that I don’t want them to watch. It affects you. It changes the chemicals in your brain. It was much more extreme than what I’ve lived. I don’t know that I’m going to go that extreme. What is it that you really really want? It got me thinking about down the road. We had that discussion as to deciding now what the rules are going to be.
You don’t just accidentally fall into a great plan. You by default are on the defensive of what is happening out there.
Class member: Technology as a good tool. I used to think texting was bad because you don’t get a personal feel. My niece is in the Philipines serving a mission. I took it to my side of the family. Please pray for her. We didn’t know anything about her for a week. We didn’t know anything. It was a great tool to quickly get to our family members to say please pray for her. Her Mom was able to get on Facebook to meet with the other missionary Mom’s.
I think this is a very interesting topic because it is quite personal. There is not a ‘line’ that says do this…like tithing…pay 10%. That can be a challenge. You are deciding as a partnership. It creates some experiences. You need to teach your children how to appropriately use these tools because this is their world. When they go to college there are so many things that are online it becomes a very frightening thing for them. We need to learn. All the General Authorities all have very high quality phones they can do everything on, but you don’t see them doing it during the meeting. Go to LDS.org. See how many thing…tips for teaching little people, youth, thanksgiving, Conference, anything you want is there. Have you taught your children how to appropriately use that page. Be sure that you use it in an appropriate way. Teach them how to use it.
Class member: I do think it comes down to doctrine. How many people are discouraged. I didn’t feel that way. I did feel conflicted. It boils down to agency. We have been given great power and with that comes responsibility. Teaching our children is hard when we are still learning. As a parent we should have addresses sooner…we have them Ipod touches….which we do control….they still have the ability to communicate with others. They used them for their alarms clocks. They needed to check them in with us until the next day. That is a difficult thing to back pedal with. The way it’s do-able is through the principles. The 15 year old is surviving. I would recommend taking care of it before it’s a problem. It boils down to agency.
It is hard to backpedal, but it is possible. Don’t let our children put us in a corner to where we feel like our children are pushing us into a corner.
Class member: We just had that class. My daughters YW leader said, “You daughter has and Ipod and is using it in mutual.” We had a FHE and printed out the review of the movie and reviewed it in FHE. I appreciated Cory getting into the foundation about how to make good choices. That was a big eye opener for me.
It looks like it made you ‘think’ about something and evaluate and see if that is where you want to be. So often we simply react. Parent….don’t just react. If you make a mistake correct it. They will kick and scream. Do we kick and scream at some of the lessons we are supposed to learn?
Class member: This class as a whole has taught me to look at my life more frequently. I’m in the swamp years. I feel like I’m in the trenches. This class allows me to stop and think and reflect about what I can do better.
Their leaving home comes really fast.
Class member: One of the biggest things that bugs me about electronics. We had family dinners with my extended family and everyone is staring at their cell phones. We have to be the examples. If we are making that the priority then our kids aren’t going to get it either.
It’s not even Mom and Dad all the time. The ‘world’ is always doing it. Our youth can be in the same room and texting back and forth. They need to learn to talk.
Class member: I wasn’t able to make it this time. Did he touch on how to get on the same page as your husband? My kids come and ask me because I’m home all day. I say we aren’t going to do that right now, but one child would be on it all day if I let him. He goes to my husband and he says ok.
What is comfortable for you for them to approach you if you want to get on the same page?
Class member: I think my wife approaches me and says “This is how it’s going to be.” I will be defensive. If you ask about what our opinion is and get us to weigh in on it, then we are more compliant.
That is exactly what I would have told you. When you have dialogue and talk about it you are a companionship. When you go at them and say, “I heard this in class today and we can’t watch this.” You are parenting them. You are not your spouses parent!! Women have a bigger problem with this than you do. We go right on and parent them.
Class member: I felt like Cory addressed that a little…he talked about teaching the doctrine, teaching agency, teaching the plan of salvation, and teaching the spirit. If you talk about what we are going to teach then discuss. How can we teach this? It is going to be different for your family, but use the spirit to build what your family needs.